"The Onion"

Apple Computers is laying legal claim to the term "pod," used in words like "podcast." Here are some other items Apple is trying to claim as its own:

• Human silhouettes
  
• Several thousand Chinese children
  
• Thinking differently
  
• The last slice of pizza
  
• The term "tunes"
  
• Any Granny Smith with a bite taken out of it
  
• The concept of sharing
  
• The pronoun "I"; Effective immediately Apple will collect royalties from anyone referring to oneself in this manner