What's Next?

I sit here on a Saturday night; glass of Merlot to my left, tatter tots to my right and I wonder:

What's next?
Will I be happy?
Will I be sad?
Will I move on?
Will I be stronger?
Will I learn from this?
Will it change me?
Has it changed me?
Has it helped me?
Has it harmed me?


After you've dedicated so much time and energy to one single endeavor and it fails, it is very hard to imagine what's next. You're left with limitless possibilities. You're left with no possibilities. You're a paradox. A new person awaiting further self-discovery. You wonder if you have anything else to give and if it will all be okay again.

You know it will be okay again. When will it be okay? How will it be okay? Who will make it okay? Life is full of so many questions with very little answers.

I sit here and reflect on a past full of happiness and sadness; on a future full of hope and fear and I know, despite it all, that everything will be okay and that whatever is next I can finally-- and with certainty handle.